How do you feel when you return home at the end of the day?

fractured reality/grace under pain

The NaBloPoMo prompt for today:
How do you feel when you return home at the end of the day?

I’m not sure I should have answered this one, as I doubt that my answer will be in sync with the intent of the question. I don’t leave home every day to go to work, or leave home every day, period.

However, when I do leave home, how I feel when I return depends on many factors. How did I feel before leaving? How long was I gone, and how much physical, intellectual, and emotional energy did I have to expend while I was out? Did I have to deal with anything unexpected, good or bad? How many people was I around? Were they strangers or people known to me? Did I encounter them all at once, or in small groups of one or two at a time? Was Sam with me as a buffer? How’s my blood sugar? Am I well hydrated? What was the weather like? Did I remember to take my regular medications? What about taking breakthrough pain medication, anxiety medication, or a muscle relaxant before I found myself in a state where they wouldn’t work very well? Did I use my scooter if there was much walking? How noisy was the environment? Was it drafty, overly hot or cold? Did I have to drive? Was I out to do something I wanted to do, or was I doing something I had to do?

Frequently, I’m so dog-tired that I can barely drag myself in the door. I have actually fallen asleep sitting in the car, in the driver’s seat, more than once. (There are plenty of reasons that I do not drive much anymore.) Dealing with the security system seems an intellectual challenge designed for Einstein. I’m easily confused and my memory is beyond poor. Even if I am dehydrated or I need to eat, I’m too tired to be interested in food or even water. If I was out for too long, or if it was a particularly stressful period, I get a fever and my body reacts as if I’m in shock. I feel like I’m freezing, no matter what the actual temperature around me is, and I start shaking badly.

So that’s how I feel most days when I return home at the end of the day if I’ve had to leave home. I think that should go a long way towards explaining why I’m such a homebody these days! I am fortunate in that I have Sam, Katie, and others in my life, so I am able to have a fulfilling life without being very adventurous.

Cyn is Rick's wife, Katie's Mom, and Esther & Oliver's Mémé. She's also a professional geek, avid reader, fledgling coder, enthusiastic gamer (TTRPGs), occasional singer, and devoted stitcher.
Posts created 4262

2 thoughts on “How do you feel when you return home at the end of the day?

  1. Thanks for this… when I come in the door after work I am horrified by the state of my home (fibro means that I have to concentrate on doing what it takes to ensure my home isn’t closed for health violations). If only I could make it what everyone says it should be… a refuge… but having a full time job, a 70 year old husband with arthritis, a 4 hour a day round trip commute to a high stress job in Boston, a dog, a cat, and two guinea pigs… means I don’t make much progress! Just took the dog to the state park for a walk on a lovely fall day, but tradeoffs mean I’ll hang in and make supper for my husband, then go to bed. That’s my day. For some reason, I think you can relate!

    Love the NaBloPoMo prompts, maybe I will use them to get me writing. And the image with this post really communicated the pain of having fibro. Thank you.

  2. Nice to see you here!

    I definitely understand. I’d freak out if anybody but family were to visit here right now. Probably just lay right down and die! And I don’t work.

    A four hour commute? That’s like having a second job!

    A couple of my recent posts aren’t showing, so I need to troubleshoot them.

    The image is incredible. I found it on Flickr, and am definitely watching that artist, who is very talented.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Related Posts

Begin typing your search term above and press enter to search. Press ESC to cancel.

Back To Top