Where?

This won’t hurt much by Ter­ry Jones

For some time now, I’ve been try­ing to find out where my son goes after choir prac­tice. He sim­ply refus­es to tell me. He says it’s no busi­ness of mine where he goes after choir prac­tice and it’s a free country.

Now it may be a free coun­try, but if peo­ple start going just any­where they like after choir prac­tice, good­ness knows whether we’ll have a coun­try left to be free. I mean, he might be going to anar­chist meet­ings or Islam­ic study groups. How do I know? 

The thing is, if peo­ple don’t say where they’re going after choir prac­tice, this coun­try is at risk. So I have been apply­ing a cer­tain amount of pres­sure on my son to tell me where he’s going. To begin with I sim­ply put a bag over his head and chained him to a radi­a­tor. But did that per­suade him? Does the Pope eat kosher?

(You’ll have to go read the rest at The Guardian’s site)