Redhead Manual

Happy Birth­day waya!

Today’s quote:
Love thy neigh­bour as your­self, but choose your neighbourhood.
–Louise Beal

I’m swip­ing this from cybr­cat. rasilio and the rest of you for­tu­nate enough to have red­heads of your very own, pay attention!

First of all, con­grat­u­la­tions on your acqui­si­tion of a red­head! Fol­low these sim­ple steps to ensure safe­ty. May your user expe­ri­ence be an enjoy­able one! 

1. Pro­vide with qual­i­ty orgasms fre­quent­ly. Fail­ure to do so many result in out­right hostility. 

2. Keep out of direct sun­light unless SPF of 45 or greater is applied liberally. 

3. You like freck­les. Think of some­thing fun to say about them. Repeat as necessary. 

4. Should your red­head become unco­op­er­a­tive, repeat step one. 

5. Should step one fail, approach with gifts, apolo­gies, and per­haps a sweet alco­holic beverage. 

6. Take your red­head out to dance on tables and raise hell every now and then. Should you not be qual­i­fied, drop her off at a girl­friend’s house for this activity. 

7. Be excit­ing and cre­ative. Should you fail in this endeav­or, your red­head may become pouty and rest­less. If in doubt, refer direct­ly to step num­ber 1. 

8. Com­pli­ment fre­quent­ly in new ways. When in doubt, repeat. Espe­cial­ly pow­er­ful in com­bi­na­tion with step num­ber 1. 

9. Should your red­head become agi­tat­ed, take a moment to enjoy this. It is a fea­ture, not a bug! Repeat steps 1–8 and it should soon pass. 

10. Should you find main­te­nance to be too dif­fi­cult, please return your red­head. Some­one else will be wait­ing for pick up. Note: Please noti­fy sam­bear should you have any doubt of this 😉 

Cyn is Rick's wife, Katie's Mom, and Esther & Oliver's Mémé. She's also a professional geek, avid reader, fledgling coder, enthusiastic gamer (TTRPGs), occasional singer, and devoted stitcher.
Posts created 4241

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Related Posts

Begin typing your search term above and press enter to search. Press ESC to cancel.

Back To Top