This is a time of changes for us anyway, whether we like it or not. We don’t know how the whole custody thing will fall out, for one thing, and there is other stuff going on, too.
While it may seem a stupid time to make other changes, for various reasons it actually seems a perfect time. So…
Back to School
I sent off my online application to Southern Polytechnic State University tonight, for summer semester. I hope to finish my student aid forms tomorrow. I requested transcripts from all three places I attended in the past. I have to get their damned immunization form completed at the health department, which means a trip there (not looking forward to that) and they may say I need a booster or something. I’m probably past due on tetanus, anyway.
I counted up my old credits—71 hours with a 3.98 GPA. Unfortunately, they’re so old (over 10 years) that it’s unlikely they’ll be counted for anything except making me a transfer student rather than a non-traditional student (just a box on a form somewhere, apparently). I’m hoping to talk SOMEONE into at least giving me credit for classes like English 101/102 and Political Science 101 because they were deadly boring the first time around. (Okay, I didn’t have to take Eng 101 due to AP test credit—does that go stale too?) The head of the technical communications department indicated that he should be able to get me credit for the English stuff, at least. Here’s hoping.
I’ll almost certainly have to take the “college placement exam” to prove that I can read, write, and do basic math. I passed the Regent’s Exam saying that I can read and write well enough to graduate from a state college back in 1988 or so, but I have to take another saying I can do so well enough to go back to school. That 1400 on the SATs doesn’t matter anymore, thankyouverymuch (700/700 split), because it was in 1982 or 1983.
I didn’t think I’d ever do this. I’m planning to go to a Weight Watchers meeting tomorrow morning. I want to learn to eat in a more healthy way and improve my relationship with food, which has NEVER been good. I’m going to start doing more of the grocery shopping and food preparation here. That has been sambear’s purview, by his choice, but he’s got too much going on at the moment and needs a break. So this is a good opportunity to change in several ways—and curiousmay9 has been a very good influence on me lately.
Yes, I’m still into size acceptance. But I don’t feel good right now, and I know that getting weight off would definitely help the arthritis in my hips and knees a lot. That, in turn, would help with the fibromyalgia. I need to move more, too. I walked a lot more today and yesterday than usual, and I feel more energetic despite having some increased pain. Maybe I’ll actually get some sleep tonight.
And no matter how many times I look at, for instance,and see an incredibly beautiful woman, when I look at my own face in the mirror I’m hit every time with the fact that it doesn’t look like I’m “supposed” to look. The me in my head is about 18 and weighs 120 pounds. Now, that’s really about 20 pounds underweight for me, but I’m way, way past a weight where I like how I look. What I see now is ugly to me.