Why Defining “Polyamory” IS Important

I found this draft of a post from Feb­ru­ary 2014, and while I would­n’t ordi­nar­i­ly react to any­thing as old as that post, the draft was too good to toss away. I don’t nor­mal­ly respond to oth­er peo­ple’s blog posts, but I’ve seen a par­tic­u­lar notion all over the place, so I am going to respond […]

Defining Love

Plinky asked, “If you even­tu­al­ly break up with some­one, was it ever true love?” What sort of sil­ly ques­tion is that? If a per­son dies, was he tru­ly alive?  Yes, rela­tion­ships based on true love some­times end. That does­n’t mean that they are fail­ures, any more than lives that end are fail­ures. The “hap­pi­ly ever after” thing […]

TotD: Emma Goldman on Love

Love, the strongest and deep­est ele­ment in all life, the har­bin­ger of hope, of joy, of ecsta­sy; love, the defi­er of all laws, of all con­ven­tions; love, the freest, the most pow­er­ful mold­er of human des­tiny; how can such an all-com­pelling force be syn­ony­mous with that poor lit­tle State and Church-begot­ten weed, mar­riage? Free love? […]

TotD: Carter Heyward on Love

Carter Hey­ward: Love, like truth and beau­ty, is con­crete. Love is not fun­da­men­tal­ly a sweet feel­ing; not, at heart, a mat­ter of sen­ti­ment, attach­ment, or being “drawn toward.” Love is active, effec­tive, a mat­ter of mak­ing rec­i­p­ro­cal and mutu­al­ly ben­e­fi­cial rela­tion with one’s friends and ene­mies. Love cre­ates right­eous­ness, or jus­tice, here on earth. To […]

TotD: Eating and Drinking

This pas­sage remind­ed me of Sam: Peo­ple ask me: Why do you write about food, and eat­ing and drink­ing? Why don’t you write about the strug­gle for pow­er and secu­ri­ty, and about love, the way oth­ers do? They ask it accus­ing­ly, as if I were some­how gross, unfaith­ful to the hon­or of my craft. The eas­i­est answer is […]

And That’s the Week

I con­sid­er Sun­day the first day of the week rather than the last. It was a week full of appoint­ments for the girl and get­ting paper­work shuf­fled to var­i­ous bureau­cra­cies. Sam and I had love­ly dates Wednes­day and tonight, although we were so exhaust­ed Wednes­day that we turned in much ear­li­er than usual.

Pirates!

Not the nice, John­ny Depp kind, no. The pillage/rape/murder sort spiced up with demon-wor­­ship­ping shark peo­ple. Tonight was date night, and I was impa­tient to be back to our game. We’d left off at a very unre­solved point the last time we played, before the week­end. It would be almost impos­si­ble for some­one else to […]

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