“Anoth­er blue sweater? You have four of those. Why not get some­thing dif­fer­ent for a change?”

“No, I have navy, corn­flower, Williams­burg, and baby blue sweaters. This one is roy­al blue. That’s total­ly dif­fer­ent!”

Okay guys, I know that you thought women were mak­ing up some of the col­or names we use. Char­treuse? Why not say green? And garnet—that’s red, right? What’s this about plum, amethyst, grape, vio­let, mauve, and fuschia all being dif­fer­ent? They’re all pur­ple, aren’t they?

No, real­ly, they aren’t. We don’t make them up just to vex you. They’re all very, very dif­fer­ent, which is why we would nev­er con­sid­er wear­ing brick red lip­stick with a cher­ry red sweater. Ick!

Now there’s help for you. Free help, even!