2002 Review


Five things that 2002 taught me:
1) I can for­give much more than I thought I could.
2) There are far more peo­ple in this world who care about me or are inter­est­ed in me than I thought a year ago.
3) Things I thought I’d just have to “put up with” can, in fact, be changed for the better.
4) Fam­i­ly of choice is every bit as impor­tant as blood relatives.
5) I can, in fact, share Sam with oth­er loves. I was­n’t whol­ly sure, as I haven’t ever loved any­one as deeply as I love him.

Five per­son­al­ly sig­nif­i­cant events of 2002:
1) I re-entered coun­sel­ing. Sam start­ed ther­a­py. Our fam­i­ly con­tin­ued therapy.
2) Rela­tion­ship with Sam deep­ened great­ly and our fam­i­ly inter­ac­tions con­tin­ued to improve.
3) Met god­dessin­ga and greyknight and became a quad.
4) I had a miscarriage.
5) G (Sam’s daugh­ter) was hos­pi­tal­ized for depression.
5) Sam and I joined Trybalaka.
6) Sam and I began seri­ous­ly writ­ing a nov­el together.
7) I start­ed tak­ing two med­ica­tions that great­ly improved my sleep and over­all ener­gy lev­el, which real­ly improved my qual­i­ty of life.
8) Dealt with major surgery and ill­ness of some­one I dear­ly love, who is thank­ful­ly on the mend now.

Five things I want to do in 2003:
1) Con­tin­ue toss­ing emo­tion­al baggage.
2) Con­tin­ue to deep­en rela­tion­ships with all of my family/loves.
3) Fin­ish that novel.
4) Find some way to bring in more mon­ey that does­n’t require less time with my family.
5) Con­tin­ue my education.
6) Con­tin­ue the process of bet­ter orga­niz­ing my home and life
7) Improve my health.

Five things I don’t want to do in 2003:
1) Have any avoid­able crises.
2) Give in to the temp­ta­tion to “res­cue” anybody.
3) Spend ener­gy mourn­ing past mistakes.
4) Allow any­one to come between me and my family.
5) Fall back into any bad habits.

Five peo­ple who I’d like to know bet­ter in 2003: (Far more than five!)
sam­bear, greyknight and god­dessin­ga
Our kids, G, shad­owkatt, realpochac­co, Son and Lit­tle Miss
mique_mique, Alice, Bri­an, Susan, Joyce, Aaron, James, John, Ron, Dianne — I know I’m leav­ing some­one out.
Every­body on my LJ friends list

So much has hap­pened in the last few months that it’s dif­fi­cult to remem­ber the rest of the year! I’d have to say that the quad is the biggest news of the year for me. But there has been a lot, and I have to say that it’s been very good.

We began the year with cybr­cat’s birth­day par­ty, which was love­ly. We haven’t seen near­ly enough of her and her hus­band and son this year, though.

Stalk­er creep post­ed pros­ti­tu­tion ads in my name again—nothing new. What was new was post­ing them in my moth­er’s name, too, and includ­ing my par­ents’ phone num­ber in the ads. He also put my par­ents’ names, phone num­bers, home address, and Mom’s place of employ­ment on his web­site. We were in court repeat­ed­ly for months while the Gwin­nett Coun­ty Police Depart­ment flailed about incom­pe­tent­ly and nev­er did sub­poe­na the prop­er infor­ma­tion to do any­thing mean­ing­ful. He’s gone into hid­ing again for the time being, and I found that I just don’t get near­ly so upset these days—I know we’re as safe as we can be from him, and he’s real­ly just a nui­sance like a mos­qui­to buzzing around. He has no pow­er over me, but I’ll swat him if I get the oppor­tu­ni­ty to do so.

My par­ents gave me Mom’s old sewing machine and I start­ed tak­ing a sewing class at Joann Fab­rics. I was­n’t able to fin­ish it due to the next change…

I start­ed work­ing at a com­pa­ny near here with an agree­ment that I’d work 30 hours a week and get health insur­ance for me and Katie—that would allow me to be home by the time R & G were home from school. After a month (when the insur­ance was sup­posed to kick in), the com­pa­ny informed me that no, I’d have to work full time to get ben­e­fits. So I quit. This may seem like a bad thing, but it was actu­al­ly a pos­i­tive thing—I set and main­tained healthy bound­aries, did­n’t take any crap from them, and did­n’t feel guilty at all about walk­ing away.

We found that Katie is aller­gic to yet anoth­er antibi­ot­ic. She start­ed hav­ing migraines. We found one med­ica­tion that pre­vent­ed most of them and anoth­er that stops most of them in their tracks if she takes it as soon as she real­izes one is hap­pen­ing. She had a sleep study, which ver­i­fied that she has rest­less leg syn­drome, and start­ed tak­ing med­ica­tion which great­ly improves her sleep—thus improv­ing her life in gen­er­al. She very sel­dom has fibromyal­gia pain com­plaints now and is feel­ing much bet­ter now than a year ago.

Home­school­ing just gets more and more won­der­ful for all of us.

We final­ly replaced my old car, buy­ing Allu­na. I loved not hav­ing a car pay­ment for sev­er­al years, but the old car was real­ly on its last legs, and we have much more free­dom and reli­a­bil­i­ty with Alluna.

A good friend FINALLY left the psy­chobitch to whom he was mar­ried. There was much rejoicing!

Babies and tod­dlers seemed to become a much big­ger part of our lives this year. rasilio and _starrgirl_ were bring­ing Jack­son over for games. Our friends Alisa and David had lit­tle Rhi­an­na. We spent some time with che­lona and volt­bang with Mad­die. At one point we had a CUUPs event here and there were six infants and tod­dlers crawl­ing around in our liv­ing room. That trend con­tin­ued through the year so now we have a baby bed (on loan from friends) set up here for as long as they’ll let us use it. Sam and I decid­ed that if we get preg­nant, it’ll be a bless­ing, so we stopped try­ing to pre­vent pregnancy.

The year in pets: Alan­na adopt­ed us. A few months lat­er we had to find a new home for her after she decid­ed that lit­ter box­es just weren’t her thing. The kit­tens, Mica and Moon­stone, came into our lives. Zoë (the dog) left. Most recent­ly, Boone saun­tered in. Shel­ley con­tin­ues to hang on but does­n’t seem to be feel­ing well at all, so I don’t know how much longer we’ll have her with us. She seems to have reached some sort of feline agree­ment with Boone, though, as if she’s pass­ing Katie to him.

Sam and I worked out the agree­ments under which we felt com­fort­able open­ing our rela­tion­ship again, and as men­tioned above, we met our sweet­ies. Find­ing anoth­er cou­ple was a HUGE sur­prise. We also got to actu­al­ly attend a cou­ple of Poly South­east events and met more poly peo­ple in oth­er ways.

We got a piano and enough book­shelves to put all of our books out in decent order. We got a bet­ter mat­tress for our bed. We set up a Lin­ux serv­er run­ning Sam­ba. We ran net­work cabling down to the playroom.

I acknowl­edged some­thing I’ve tried to avoid nam­ing for years. I removed tox­ic peo­ple from my life. I began singing reg­u­lar­ly again. I allowed pic­tures of myself to not only be tak­en but shared on the inter­net. Our fire­place was FINALLY fixed after over a year of com­plaints to the land­lord, so we are enjoy­ing it again. I start­ed jour­nal­ing here.

Cur­rent Mood: 🤔con­tem­pla­tive
Cur­rent Music: Fam­i­ly play­ing Scrab­ble and Lit­tle Miss singing
Cyn is Rick's wife, Katie's Mom, and Esther & Oliver's Mémé. She's also a professional geek, avid reader, fledgling coder, enthusiastic gamer (TTRPGs), occasional singer, and devoted stitcher.
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